Reading through “The Blessing” right now by John Trent and Gary Smalley. The book is over 20 years old but holds some wonderful truths. according to the authors, there are 5 things that your children need from you that will help them fell “blessed” by you. Not blessed out…
- Meaningful Touch
- Spoken Words
- Expressing High Value
- Picturing a Special Future
- An Active Commitment
Each one of these brings its own mental pictures when we, as parents, begin to think through how we are attempting to raise our kids. You might have been raised in a home that displayed each of these 5 elements or you might have been in a home where there were none. Let me suggest something: Don’t let your past negatively affect your future with your kids…whether you are about to become empty nesters or you haven’t started your family. As I have said before, start now…no matter where you are in life.
I’m not going to attempt to go through each one of the 5 elements, but I do want to give some thoughts on a couple of them.
What kind of words do you use with your kids. You might say, ” I’m not harsh with my words” or “I don’t have to tell them all the time that I love them…they know it”. To both of those comments I say…”FOUL” Just because you aren’t harsh doesn’t mean you are kind…pick your words carefully…kids remember what you say, kids remember how you respond to them. See Proverbs 15:1 and 23. When your kids grow up and move away, will they ever say this: ” My parents told me they loved me too much” NO!!! Tell them…Deuteronomy 6 them…tell them when you are at home, on the road, when you lie down, when you wake up. I think I can say for a certainty that you will NEVER regret telling your kids how much you love them…or, speaking words of encouragement into them…
Does anyone else see that these ideas can be put into practice with our spouse as well?
I think I get preachy sometimes when it comes to talking about raising kids and being married…well, guess what? I’m a man and I need to be reminded of most of what I write…but ladies, you are not off the hook…you need to be reminded as well…
What do you value? Do you value your time with your kids, your time with your spouse? Tell them how valuable they are to you. Don’t let the years go by and your family not know how valuable they are to you. That goes for your friends, too. Last year I hurt one of my friends by some of the things I said. I apologized, but I did not communicate with them for quite a while…was I showing them how valuable their friendship was…no…if you value something, you let that object of your value know it…take my Taurus for instance…I don’t value it very much…I haven’t washed it in a long time…I’m sure it feels undervalued…Do your kids,spouse or friends feel that way…like you don’t value them?
Let them know!
I value my wife…don’t know where I would be without her. I try not to assume that she knows that…I try to tell her. She may even read this…
LINDA…I VALUE YOU… I LOVE YOU…
JOHN…I VALUE YOU…I LOVE YOU…
NOAH…I VALUE YOU…I LOVE YOU…
KARLI…I VALUE YOU…I LOVE YOU…
Enough said!
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